Kismet Loop

[The drone captures Dirge's huge form half in shadow perched on the roof of an old mausoleum, surveying the graveyard below like some hideous teal vulture.]

I don't understand...

[He mutters, claws tapping at the ancient stone statue of whomever is interred there curiously. He pinches the chin and squints into its eyes for a moment before shaking his head.]

What is the point of this ritual?

[Dirge jumps down, landing on all fours and crouching near a tombstone.]

What a terrible waste! Body parts are so very useful...

[He flicks the grave and it pitches forward a little.] Why bury them in the ground? Or lock them in boxes? Is someone saving these for later?

I know decaying organic can be used to grow things. People bring flowers, but they do not plant them.

[It's everyone's favorite bonkers clone, this time surprisingly lacking in anything weird like extra arms or handfuls of broken tomato pots. He is cringing though, very much different from his normal, confident behavior.]

He's here. And he won't leave me alone.


[Dirge glances over his shoulder, wings wilting low on his back.] I mean... I've always wanted attention from him. It was nice at first but...

[He interrupts himself with a scowl, actually turning to the side and taking a swipe at something off camera.]

And you! I did not kill you! This isn't fair! I had your word and now its worthless.

[His optics wander to his shoulder and he vents a sigh. There's a shimmery, half-translucent bird person sitting there now, pointing up at him accusingly.]


It was an accident. How do you think I felt about spitting feathers for days? If I'd wanted to eat you, I wouldn't have done it with my engine!

[Dirge seems to be holding the drone like a selfie cam, even though its perfectly capable of floating at any angle on its own. He seems to be too excited to remember that.]

Today is a very good day. I knew following the light colors would lead me to something shiny.

[He turns the drone to the left revealing what looks like an honest to goodness pot o' gold.]

Yes, it is gold. And yes, its all mine. I've heard humans place high value on this particular ore. I can understand why- not only is it very pretty, but it tastes great. [Yup, he's been eating it. Maybe that's why his tongue is all sparkly?]

The gold isn't the only thing I found though... [Dirge's grin grows wide as he finally lets go of the drone, allowing it to float back a bit.]

There was also a strange little organic. Smaller than adult humans. Spoke funny. I was going to keep him but he offered me something if I let him go.

[Dirge lifts his arms in a shrugging motion and two more unfold from behind his back. He seems incredibly pleased with them.]

A wish! I've always thought having more arms would make everything easier- grab twice the stuff, put things away twice as fast, hold two times more things at once. Not to mention, two times the claws.

[He flexes them all to demonstrate-- twenty wicked teal knives are nothing to sneer at.]

Time to try these out in the warehouse~

[The screen flicks on, but there seems to be something wrong with a it. A long crack runs down the right side, fragmenting the image. The color also seems off, though its hard to tell if you haven't seen the speaker's paintjob before.]

Oh, you do still work. Hm.

[A big seeker of a less boxy variety than most leans in and raps on the screen with a knuckle, sending the drone drifting backwards with a distressed beep.]


I'll have to go find a bigger rock.